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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23159254">Dammit Chris</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sarcastic_Soulmate/pseuds/Sarcastic_Soulmate'>Sarcastic_Soulmate</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Season 3 Episodes [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Parks and Recreation</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Awkward Conversations, Jealousy, Online Dating, Other, Temporarily Unrequited Love</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 12:01:50</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,256</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23159254</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sarcastic_Soulmate/pseuds/Sarcastic_Soulmate</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The conversation Ben and Chris have about inter-government relationships, and POVs from different characters during the episode 'Soulmates.' (S03E10)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Chris Traeger &amp; Ben Wyatt, Leslie Knope &amp; Ann Perkins, Leslie Knope/Ben Wyatt</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Season 3 Episodes [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1927507</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>48</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Ben and Chris (I'm really bad at titles, don't judge.)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"She is LITERALLY the perfect date for you!"</p><p>Ben listens to Chris droning on about setting him up with yet another woman.</p><p>"Yeah, yeah, whatever," he mumbles.</p><p>He didn't mean to sound so incredibly annoyed about it, but there's only one woman he is interested in at the moment, and Chris playing matchmaker and bringing him farther and farther away from Leslie was not helping. </p><p>    Chris' eyes narrow. "You don't seem very enthusiastic about this. You have a crush on someone, don't you?"</p><p>His eyes light up. "Oh my god, Ben Wyatt has a crush!"</p><p>Ben rolls his eyes. "No, what? I dont, um, have a crush on anyone, uhhh, nope."</p><p>He shouldn't be surprised that his awkward stammering is not very convincing. "Ok fine, I like someone, she works in this building, in one of the departments. I might try to.... socialize with her soon."</p><p>He hopes that bit of information is enough to satisfy him. He doesn't want Chris to start guessing who it is, because if there's one thing he knows about his best friend and co-worker, it's his inability to keep a secret. Then Leslie would find out, and crap, just thinking about her big blue eyes and bouncing blonde hair brings a smile to his face. </p><p>Chris' face falls. "I'm sorry Ben, but it's against the rules."</p><p>Ben's face has a bunch of conflicting emotions. "Sorry, what?"</p><p>Chris scratches his head. "I have a policy that restricts inter-government relationships. Relationships between supervisors and their employees lead to fraud, corruption, and misuse of public funds." </p><p>Ben looks at the floor, desperate to avoid eye contact. He finally finds someone that he has so much chemistry with, is almost certain she feels the same way, but he can't act on his feelings because of his job? Dammit Chris!</p><p>"I really have to go do s-something, I'll be b-back in a bit." Ben stammers as he walks out of the room, trying to get out of this awkward conversation.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Please God help me figure out title names</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>POVs from Ann and Leslie when Ben rejects her and they make a dating profile.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Or we could go out after work; go to JJ's or something, grab a bite?" </p><p> Ben freezes. It was easier to tamp his feelings down (though not very effective) when he assumed she didn't like him. </p><p> "Um, I don't think I can. But why don't we just talk about it later.... In this building? Okay?" He pauses. "But you're great, you have great ideas, and, uh...... bye." He awkwardly turns and walks away into a random office. </p><p> Leslie walks into the Parks Department, ignoring April and Andy's nosy questions about why she looked so glum. </p><p> "Babe, do you think Leslie's ok?" She hears Andy ask his wife. Whatever April replied, she couldn't hear it as she had just walked into her office and closed the door. </p><p>  Later, Ann drops by her office. Personally, Leslie thinks Ann is moving too fast with all her new flings, but she didn't know how to say it (even though that's never stopped her before), so she just didn't say anything. </p><p> "So I asked Ben out to dinner, and he said no." </p><p> "What? He seemed really into you. What did he say exactly?" Ann generally didn't try to read into situations like this, but there had to be some reason he said no. He was so obviously into her, to the point where she was surprised no one from the Parks Department has said anything about it. But she didn't want to get Leslie obsessing and trying to analyze the situation, so she didn't push. </p><p> "He was like 'Huh, what? Uh... Bye.' And then he walked into an office that wasn't his."</p><p> Ann narrows her eyes. 'Interesting,' she thinks. </p><p>___________________________________________________________________</p><p> Somehow, it's a few hours later, and Ann had roped her into making a dating profile. The name of the site sounded kind of sleazy to Leslie, but who was she to judge? It's not like she had much experience with internet dating, and maybe all sites sounded like that. She hated how "HoosierMate.com" had the word 'mate' in it, like it was going to find her a mate. What was she, a bird? </p><p> "A 98% match? That's a soulmate-level match, I've never seen anything that high before." Ann excitedly says. </p><p> "Awesome." </p><p> Ann knew she was still upset with what happened with Ben, and she's the biggest supporter of them possibly getting together, but she couldn't stand her best friend being sad over a guy, no matter how perfect they were together. 'Besides,' she thought, 'If it's going to happen, it's going to happen. This won't stop anything.' She decided she would stop trying to set Leslie up once she figures out what was going on with Ben. She didn't know why she couldn't stop thinking about it; something just didn't seem right.</p><p> "Ok, Leslie, I know what you're thinking, and you need to forget about Ben. He had his chance and he blew it. This computer could have found the future Mr. Leslie Knope." </p><p> "Okay, entire universe of guys I might date, let's see what you've got." </p><p> Ann clicks 'Show Match'. Her jaw drops. </p><p> "Ahh!" That's the only thing Leslie could think of to say. Tom Haverford's picture, staring her in the face.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>:D I hope y'all like this chapter better! The first one was kinda bad, in my opinion but I was too lazy to edit it.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Ben's Jealousy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ben's thoughts when Sewage Joe was hitting on Leslie and the 'weird juju' as Donna so elegantly put it,  going on with Tom and Leslie.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Well, looky there,  I'm getting better at titles. Also sorry that the chapters aren't in the best order.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ben watches as Tom whispers something to Leslie and they both glance at Sewage Joe. Oh no. Leslie walks up to Joe. </p><p>"Hi Joe." </p><p>"Hey Knope. Lookin' good these days." </p><p>Well, Ben couldn't argue with that. Leslie always looks good. 'This crush is getting out of hand,' he thinks.</p><p>"What do you say? Van's out back, let's roll." Joe proposed. </p><p>Ben couldn't believe what he was hearing.  Well, actually, he could. After all, Joe hits on anyone without a penis. </p><p>"Great, okay. " Leslie replied. She walked away.</p><p>Ben was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't catch Joe's next demeaning comment, but he could probably make an educated guess. </p><p>--------------------------------------------------------------------------------</p><p>"Les and I just had something magical happen today at lunch." Tom grins. He sets his hand on top of Leslie's. She doesn't push it away, so Ben was really confused about what was going on. He tries not to get jealous and mad over the fact that someone else is touching her.  </p><p>"There is some weird juju in this room right now." Donna remarks. </p><p>Leslie chooses not to address what was going on and just jumps right in to the meeting. </p><p>"Office yoga. We do stretches at our desk or next to our desk. Always good for you. " </p><p>Tom nods and stares at Leslie. He gestures for her to go on. </p><p>"We give everyone pedometers and whoever takes the most steps gets a prize. You know, anything to get their heart rate up." </p><p>Ben nods. 'God,  how is she so smart?' He thinks before he could stop himself. He reflects on his earlier thought. 'This crush really is getting out of hand,' he concludes. </p><p>"You know what else gets people's heart rate up? Doing it. Talking about sex with my boss." Tom suggests,  looking at Leslie. </p><p>Leslie has this dazed look in her eye ever since Tom had started talking. </p><p>"Can you excuse us for a second?" </p><p>"Uh, yeah." Ben quickly replies. </p><p>Leslie yanks Tom by the arm and drags him out of the room,  with no regard to Tom's complaints. He hears her scream "What is wrong with you?" before walking out of earshot. </p><p>Tom and Leslie talk for a bit and Tom comes back, without Leslie. Ben nervously tries to continue the meeting.


</p><p>-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------</p><p>




Ben waits for everyone else to walk out of the room before he stops Tom. 

"What was all that stuff with you and Leslie?" Ben asks,  trying not to sound like he had a huge, uncontrollable crush on a woman he can't have.</p><p>"The girl likes Indian food,  what can I say?" Tom replies,  unconvincingly. </p><p>Ben gives him a look. </p><p>"Fine. We got matched up on an online dating site,  I was messing with her,  she got pissed,  then she took me out in the hallway and kissed me out of revenge."</p><p>"Really?" Ben replies. </p><p>Ben has a lot of conflicting emotions. For one thing,  he's glad that there was nothing going on between them,  but there couldn't be anyway,  because it would just be like Ben and Leslie's situation. On the other hand,  Leslie's on a dating site,  she's looking to meet people, and that really stings. But then again,  internet dating doesn't sound like her thing. And Leslie did mention once that Ann is dating around and being adventurous.  Ann must have put her up to it. Or maybe that's just what he wants to believe.  </p><p>"As much as it pains me to admit this, it was not disgusting." </p><p>"Alright, I don't need the details." He really didn't. He would much rather experience it firsthand. His breath stopped for a moment when he realized he just thought that. The jealousy was flowing through his veins now, but at least Tom and Leslie's kiss didn't seem to mean anything. </p><p>"I'm just saying,  she knows what to do." Tom ignores Ben's small protests from keeping him from going into further detail. "It was stirring." </p><p>They walk out of the office. "So anyway, as I was saying..." </p><p> </p><p>----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------</p><p> </p><p>Ben was in his office now. He tried to focus on the paperwork in front of him, but his mind wandered over to Leslie. Her big blue eyes, and bright blonde hair. He smiles. Her never-ending energy. His mind even further wanders to being able to hold her,  wrapping his arms around her waist,  kissing her,  being able to look at her with so much love in his eyes without having to worry about rules and jobs and consequences.

 'We all want what we can't have,' he concludes.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Why'd You Reject Leslie?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ann had a weird feeling about this whole ordeal. She decided to get to the bottom of it all and confronts Ben about why he turned down Leslie.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>My Ann voice is not very good and I apologize cause I'm LAME xD </p><p>Also my Ben voice is not very good </p><p>Actually you know what? This whole fic is not very good. </p><p>Fight me.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ben was sitting in his office, alone. Chris had gone out for a run. The exercise ethic of that man was truly astonishing. He hears loud footsteps getting closer and closer. </p><p>Ann Perkins walks into his office with her hands on her hips. She did not look happy.</p><p>She just stood there,  glaring at him. Waiting for him to say something first. For some reason, she knew something was going on. And if there wasn't, she could at least attempt to stop him from playing with Leslie's heart. Ann thought that she had to nip this in the bud because Leslie had numerous failed relationships, and people who dumped her in cruel, unnecessary ways.</p><p>"Is everything okay?" </p><p>"Yeah,  everything's fine. Everyone's fine. Except for you and me." </p><p>"What did I do to you?" </p><p>"You mean, what did you do to Leslie?"</p><p>"Wait, what? Is Leslie okay? What happened to her?" Uh-oh,  he hoped that didn't give away anything. But he seriously didn't know what was going on. </p><p>"Why'd you reject Leslie?" </p><p>"What do you mean?" Was she talking about what happened earlier that morning? </p><p>"You keep acting like you're into her. And then you reject her. Listen, if you keep playing hot and cold with her,  you're going to have me to deal with." </p><p>"What are you talking about? You mean what happened this morning?" </p><p>"You mean when she asked you out and you turned her down? Yeah, I do. "</p><p>"She told you about that?" Dumb question, they tell each other everything and it's not like it's some extremely personal affair. Except in a lot of ways it was...</p><p> "I'M HER BEST FRIEND, OF COURSE SHE DID!" Ann yelled, aggressively.</p><p> "Ok, then why are you here?" He knows deep down that Leslie didn't send her there, because what would that accomplish? Ann must be doing something, trying to mess with him.</p><p> "I'm here because I need you to stop toying with her feelings. She's been through a lot. If you don't want to date her, fine. Then stop flirting with her and making it seem like you want her. If you keep messing around with her, you and I are going to have a problem." </p><p> 'That came off a little aggressive,' Ann thought. It's been a long day. She sees the look on Ben's eyes, of concern, confusion, and hurt.</p><p>Ben takes a deep breath. Leslie actually thought that he wasn't interested? Crap. This was not going well. </p><p> "Wait, wait, you saw me fl-flirting with her?" He looks at his desk, trying to avoid eye contact to not make it harder. </p><p> "Dude, you've been making eyes at her since forever. I'm surprised she nor anyone else hasn't noticed." </p><p> "Good lord. Okay, so there's a rule against inter-government relationships. I discussed it with Chris not too long ago, for obvious reasons. He explained to me that it's a rule that he, as the city manager, has to enforce." </p><p> Ann's eyes widen. Ben gulps, bracing himself for what he's about to say. </p><p> "Since you recall me 'making eyes' at her, you would see how this is unfortunate news to me."</p><p>Ann is speechless. "Well, I'm sorry about that.... outburst. What are you going to do?" </p><p> "There's nothing I can do. Rules are rules." Ben grimaces. </p><p> "Awwww, you really like her, don't you?" </p><p> Ben reluctantly nods. A while back he began to realize that it was more than like, but Ann didn't need to know that. </p><p> "This sucks. Wait, did you tell Chris that it was Leslie?" </p><p> "No, no, I didn't. I stuttered a lot and then awkwardly shuffled out of the room. Oh, one more thing. I would appreciate it if you didn't repeat this conversation to Leslie." </p><p> "Yeah, no, this conversation doesn't leave this room. Plus, if I told Leslie, it would do more harm than good." </p><p> Ben stands up, and Ann is about to leave when he says this. "Hey, what did you mean when you said that she's been through a lot?" </p><p> "Oh, she's had a lot of guys dump her in embarrassing ways. There was skywriting, breaking up in the shower, one guy got on one knee and begged her never to contact him again, the list goes on. Those guys were jerks. Why they had to be as cruel as possible instead of just saying 'I want to break up' is beyond me." </p><p> "Good lord." </p><p> "Yeah, Ben, so just don't hurt her. She's a strong woman, but I think another bad breakup just might break her." She walked out of his office.</p><p> Shortly after, Ben leaves, Ann's words echoing in his mind. 'Why would anyone want to break up with Leslie?' He thinks, before pushing the thought away. Best not to go down that rabbit hole. </p><p> //</p><p>Ann sits on her couch. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to confront Ben, but then again, maybe it was. 

She knew Leslie didn't deserve any of the curveballs that life threw at her. Especially her bad relationships. She remembers Mark, and Justin, and Dave. Well, Dave was a nice guy. Justin turned out to be kind of a jerk. And Mark, was, well, Mark. Ann can't believe she, herself, dated Mark for so long. But Leslie wasn't pining over him then. </p><p>She walks into her bedroom and tries to fall asleep. It really has been a long day...</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Just So Right</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Leslie, Ann, Chris, and Ben POVs when Chris tells Leslie about the rule.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"I hope there were no hard feelings after I forced you to break up with Tom." Chris says. </p><p> "Oh, we weren't..." He wasn't getting the hint. "No, no hard feelings." Better to just play along.</p><p>Frankly, Chris didn't understand why people in city hall were trying to start relationships with each other anyway. There are so many other fish in the sea. You just had to find them. At the market, at the bookstore. The right person can be just around the corner. 'But then again,' he thinks, 'The right person isn't in one designated place, or specifically not in one designated place. You just never know.' But he couldn't do anything about the rule. He doubts that Tom and Leslie would have fallen in love anyway.</p><p> "It's just a real bugaboo of mine. And it applies to everyone. Just the other day, Ben told me he might want to socialize with somebody from the government and I said 'I'm sorry, not possible.'" </p><p>Ann remembers her conversation with Ben when he mentioned this. Poor Ben. Poor Leslie. She can't believe she dated Chris. She didn't realize how oblivious he was to pretty much everything at the time. He was a good guy, but she's glad she got over him. She's glad that Leslie knows about the rule now, being part of this unspoken understanding. It's an interesting feeling, being in on this secret, but if you're someone with some common sense and insight, you realize that maybe it wasn't so secret after all.</p><p> "Really?" Leslie says, glancing at Ben. "Did he say who?" </p><p> "No, and I didn't ask, because it's irrelevant. He oversees every department. It simply can't happen." </p><p>Leslie wasn't listening as Chris changes the subject to the burger that he's eating. He runs away. She looks at Ben. Really looks at him. She sees him so in his element, she sees how they've both gone a long way, without such a big change in lifestyle and scenery. </p><p>//</p><p>Ben notices Chris talking to Leslie and Ann, but tries to avoid looking at them. 'Can't be too obvious.' He thinks. This is torture. Not being able to do anything about this huge, uncontrollable crush that only Ann knows about. He trusts her though, she's not going to tell Leslie anything, because like she said, what good will that do? Also it would be pointless, she'll find out about the rule soon enough, he hopes. He won't be able to take her thinking he isn't interested for long. </p><p>He continues talking to the people around him, about everything and nothing at the same time. He glances in Leslie's direction to see her walking up to him. </p><p> "Hey, what's up?" </p><p> "Hey. Well, uh, I think I'm allergic to chutney. Also, what's chutney?" He asks, trying to make her laugh. He loves hearing her laugh, it's like a drug he can't quit. </p><p>She giggles. "No clue."</p><p>"Yeah." </p><p> "Hey, I never got to tell you the rest of my ideas. You want to go somewhere, and talk about 'em?"  </p><p> "Yeah. Yeah, I'd love to." Was that too obvious? That was too obvious. Leslie didn't seem to mind. He internally thanked all that is good and holy for this opportunity. He gets to hang out with Leslie, but pretend it's for work reasons? What could be better? Well, he could think of a lot of things that could be better, but that'll come in time. Did he really just think that?</p><p> "Um, let me get some actual food, and then, um, do you know that wildflower mural up on the second floor?" He said. </p><p> "Mm-hmm." </p><p> "Yeah? You want to meet there?" He smiles. </p><p> "Yeah." </p><p> "Okay." </p><p> "Sounds good." Leslie says, containing her grin.</p><p>This was what she was looking for. Not someone just like her. Not someone who was the opposite. Not necessarily someone who completes her, but someone who makes her want to complete herself. Someone she felt so comfortable around, and felt so comfortable around her. </p><p>It was like a Goldilocks scenario. Not too much, not too little. It all felt just so right.</p><p>//</p><p>Ann watches Leslie and Ben. She smiles, feeling like she helped bring them to this moment. They weren't getting together, but they were getting closer, if that was even possible. </p><p>They were flirting pretty much all the time. She still doesn't understand why she seemed to be the only one to notice. And she doesn't even work with them.</p><p>Ann smiles again, feeling like there's a story there, just waiting to unfold. Or maybe it already did.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This is probably the last chapter but if you guys have any ideas for this story or future stories, I'll be happy to oblige. :)</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Let's be aware this is my first fanfic and it's really bad so don't judge xD</p></blockquote></div></div>
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